Category: Marriage

THE TORAH RELEVANT FOR TODAY

2/6/2013

Luke 1:79
“… To give light to those who sit in darkness and in the shadow of death, to guide our feet into the way of peace."

The Torah provides us with much ruling having to do with man’s inhumane behavior. Some of the things the Torah talks about would make very gory bedtime stories. How can such a heavenly document be so besmirched with the filth of human sin?

King David said that the Torah is Light (Psalms 119:105). Light is only useful when it shines in darkness. In essence, the Torah finds its mission within the spiritual darkness of our human dimension. Paul built on David’s proclamation in the Psalms with, But when anything is exposed by the light (of Torah), it (the sin of ‘anything’) becomes visible (Ephesians 5:13). He also taught his disciple Timothy that, the law (the Torah) is … not laid down for the just but for the lawless and disobedient, for the ungodly and sinners, for the unholy and profane, for those who strike their fathers and mothers, for murderers, the sexually immoral, men who practice homosexuality, enslavers, liars, perjurers, and whatever else is contrary to sound doctrine (1Timothy 1:8), and I think that includes all of us! The Torah is a Light made to reveal to us our sinful condition. As such, it is a help to direct our paths away from sinful behavior.

In studying God’s Oracles, we must be careful to distinguish between what the Torah permits and what the Torah advocates. Failure to do so can be disastrous. Whereas the Torah advocates unbroken marriages, in the knowledge of the nature of man’s heart it gave leeway for divorce (Matthew 19:8). Whereas it advocates monogamous marriages, it gave rulings concerning polygamy. It doesn’t mean that the Torah advocates divorce or polygamy, it only means that the Torah is relevant to the society in which it was given. The same goes for slavery; whereas the Torah gives ruling for slaves, it does not advocate slavery. We must be careful to study it according to its contextual values. Not understanding this could cause us to feel removed from Its text to a point of irrelevance. Many of us who would not consider polygamy as a lifestyle, practice it in a sequential manner, using one spouse, and ‘throwing it away’ for another one. Also many today who would not consider enslaving humans practice a different form of slavery through the very commonly accepted practice of usury (lending for interest) and economic policies that offer less guaranties than those offered to slaves in the Bible.

The Torah is a Light, and those who consider it obsolete live in darkness. The Torah reveals the Light of Hashem's nature and character to contrast it with ours, and those who in a cafeteria-style pick and choose what they want from it, are found to ‘edit’, or adding or taking away from the Torah in their hearts, For centuries man has tried to find a better type of government than the one offered in the Torah, and the messy results are evident. In the World to Come, the Light of Torah will expose our sinful world for what it is and we will finally learn to rule and be ruled under the justice and righteousness of Hashem.

May it come soon Abba Father, this world can’t wait any longer; too many are crying out for justice.

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THE IRREVOCABLE COVENANT!

2/5/2013

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Romans 11:29
For the gifts and the calling of God are irrevocable.

The text of rulings started in Exodus twenty can take us back to a time of cultural irrelevancy to the point that we may wonder about their current usefulness. Somehow though, these things about buying and selling children, slavery and polygamy are part of the great Horeb oracle, so to consider them irrelevant can be, and is in my opinion disrespectful.

Let’s look for example at the laws of polygamy. If he (a man) takes another wife to himself, he shall not diminish her (the first wife) food, her clothing, or her marital rights (conjugal intimacy). And if he does not do these three things for her, she shall go out for nothing, without payment of money (Exodus 21:10-11). Read from our modern western cultural viewpoint, these rulings sound barbaric; but while understanding them within their own merit and context, let’s give them a fair try.

Polygamy was an accepted Middle-East lifestyle in the days of Exodus when marriage was a business transaction. If he could afford it, a man could marry a woman for financial, political, or just plain lustful selfish reasons and once she served her 'purpose', get himself a new one to the neglect of the first one. Apparently God did not approve of this practice so He decreed that if a man re-marries, the food, the clothing and the conjugal rights of the first wife are not in any way to be diminished. If the husband doesn’t hold to that, she has automatic legal grounds to leave him and even remarry. In a certain way, that makes polygamy impossible unless you are as rich as Solomon.

We now are a far cry from these days of healthy ‘woman’s rights’. Today a man can take a woman, and if he has affairs on the side that cause him to neglect the first wife, she has to go through the cruel humiliations of being rejected in public divorce proceedings. This ruling teaches about the heart of the Father against such cruelty as rejecting a wife.

A common teaching today is replacement theology: the ideology that because of sin God rejected His first wife Israel in favor of Christianity. For many, this explains our on-going exile, the inquisitions and the Holocaust. People easily understand replacement theology scenario because of the way they live and generally understand God through the lenses of their own perverted divorce-accepting viewpoint. First, God hates divorce (Exodus 20:14; Matthew 10:2-9), and as far as Israel is concerned, Paul explains that, “the gifts and the calling of Hashem are irrevocable (Romans 11:29)”. First, if God practices the irrevocable putting away of wives because of sin, Christians are also in danger. Second, even if He did, our relationship with Him was not to be diminished.

My point here is that this commandment reveals the true nature and character of the Father. He may chastise us for awhile to help us know and trust Him more, but never in an attempt to drive us away from Him, and He doesn’t go from ‘bride’ to ‘bride’ as mankind seems to enjoy doing today. We can now see not that this seemingly archaic rule teaches us much about our current value system and even our theology.

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THE BALANCE OF A MAN

1/30/2013

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1Timothy 3:2-6 (CJB)
A congregation leader must be above reproach, he must be faithful to his wife, temperate, self-controlled, orderly, hospitable and able to teach. He must not … get into fights; …, he must be kind and gentle. He must not be a lover of money … if a man can't manage his own household, how will he be able to care for God's Messianic Community? He must not be a new believer, because he might become puffed up with pride and thus fall under the same judgment as did the Adversary.

In Genesis 2:18, Hashem intentions towards Adam in creating Eve are either lost in translation, or in the personal bias of the translator. A more literal reading would say, "I will create someone to be 'against' him". It seems that the help man most often needs is in the form of someone who is ‘against’ him; not someone who necessarily fights him, but someone who challenges him and is a balance to him. Because of this, Judaism even advises to not trust the teaching of a Rabbi who is not married.

A wise man will invite the counsel of his wife; she really is the one who knows him best. If he willingly listens to her, not only his life will be more harmonious, but he will make wiser decisions. But a wise woman needs to learn how to ‘fitly’ advise her husband. If she nags him or makes him feel inferior, he’ll turn off and she won’t be able to fulfill her God-given duty. She also needs not to do it as an attempt to control him. If because of control issues, passiveness, or a lack of wisdom a wife is not able to advise her husband, she fails in her main reason for being. The same goes for a wife who fans her husband, which a woman usually does that because she wants to bask in his glory. Such a woman will be responsible for her man's downfall. A beautiful example of a married relationship in American History is that of the second president of the United States John Adams, and his wife Abigail Adams. It is even said that one time Georges Washington asked Abigail Adams' help to try to convince her husband of an important piece of diplomatic strategy.

When Roman Emperor Tiberius started commandeering the Senate, one senator protested and compared his governing body to an unheard and ignored wife. If a man, if a leader does not have a wife, he should at least be able to listen to the counsel of those wise people God put around him. It is a wise man who surrounds himself with people who are wiser than him. Paul was not married, but he worked within counsel. Though he took some liberties, he went to Jerusalem to make sure that his race was not in vain. He sought the approval of his own apostolic leaders (Galatians 2:2).

Sad to say though, many leaders in their pride, fear, and insecurity surround themselves with passive people who adulate them, or with those who find an interest in the relationship, so they will not balance a leader or a teacher. Even if they try, they eventually will give in. The leader knows it and it will be his downfall in the sight of God if not in the sight of men.

May God give us leaders men who have a right spirit before Him; leaders whom the position of office does not corrupt with pride; true humble ministers of Hashem’s flock who only wish to serve.

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THE SABBATH OF THE VIRTUOUS BRIDE

3/15/2012

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Luke 10:42
But one thing is needful: and Mary hath chosen that good part, which shall not be taken away from her.

Moses gathers the Congregation of Israel to give them the instructions concerning the building of the Tabernacle. No matter how important this work is, they must stop everything to honor the Sabbath (Exodus 35). To cancel the Sabbath because of God’s work is like the story I read one time about a little girl who canceled the time she usually spent with her father in the evening in order to knit him bedroom slippers. The father was broken-hearted. God may appreciate the bedroom slippers, but He’d rather have us!

This training on the importance of Sabbath-keeping continues until today within congregation of Jewish believers. Joseph of Arimathea and Nicodemus made sure Yeshua was entombed before the coming of the Sabbath. The Marys who took care of His body waited till the Sabbath was over to embalm Him. If Yeshua had made the Sabbath obsolete, they didn’t seem to know. In the first century C. E., the historian Josephus reports that in his time there was not a single city in the whole Roman Empire where the Jewish custom of Sabbath-keeping was not practiced. This was because of the Yeshua believers disseminated throughout the Empire. Up to the fourth century Constantine was passing laws against the Yeshua believers forbidding this practice. Why did he do that if believers were not practicing it? Obviously, Yeshua expected His disciples to continue the practice until the end; He even gave a prophecy about it (Matthew 24:20).

In Sabbath observant homes, each Friday night the idea of Moses gathering the Children of Israel to first keep the Sabbath before instructing them about the Tabernacle is repeated when a father gathers his family around the Sabbath table. He is like Moses, and his family is like the congregation. Throughout the Bible, the congregation is compared to the Bride. On Friday night the father speaks Proverbs 31 to his wife. This proverb is often used by spiritually abusive men to keep their wives under submission. They put their own twist under the word ‘virtuous’, describing a mousy yielded and submitted women who lives only to serve her husband. Reading the whole proverb actually reveals that this virtuous woman was anything but mousy. Along with being a mother, she was a business woman working hard not behind or under her husband, but alongside beside him. The ‘wife’ language in the proverb is actually an analogy. It is the same analogy Paul uses with the Ephesians (Ephesians 5:25-32).. Both the Proverb and the Paul’s admonition speak of the Congregation and its responsibility as the Bride to work this Endtime harvest alongside with our ‘Husband’. In this respect, since man is the head of the woman (even though the woman may often be the neck that turns it), Proverbs 31 is for men, about their jobs of leading their families and the congregation in the ways and the work of the Master.

As faithful brides coming from the harvest in the wings, may God grant us for as long as possible the joy and freedom to come and ‘sabbath’ in His loving arms.

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"SHE SHALL BE CALLED 'WOMAN'"

2/8/2012

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1Timothy 3:1-6 (CJB)
Here is a statement you can trust: …
A congregation leader must be above reproach, he must be faithful to his wife, temperate, self-controlled, orderly, hospitable and able to teach. He must not … get into fights; …, he must be kind and gentle. He must not be a lover of money. … if a man can't manage his own household, how will he be able to care for God's Messianic Community? He must not be a new believer, because he might become puffed up with pride and thus fall under the same judgment as did the Adversary.

The concerns and intentions God wanted to express in this statement seem to be lost either in translation or in the chauvinist bias of the translator. Instead of “helper fit for him”, the Hebrew says, “a helper against him”. It seems that the help man most often needs is someone to be ‘against’ him; not someone to fight him, but someone to be a balance to him. Because of this, Judaism even advises to not trust the teaching of a man who is not married. Such a man doesn’t have balance.

As much as it goes against his grain, a wise man will invite the counsel of his wife. Not only his life will be more harmonious if he willingly listens to her, but he will make wiser decisions. A wise woman needs to learn how to ‘fitly’ advise her husband. If she nags him or makes him feel inferior, he’ll turn off and she won’t be able to fulfill her God-given duty. She needs also not to do it as an attempt to control him. If because of control issues, passiveness, or a lack of wisdom a wife is not able to advise her husband, she fails in her main reason for being. The same goes for one who fans her husband. A woman usually does that because she wants to bask in his glory. She will then be responsible for his downfall.. A beautiful example of a married relationship in American History is that of the second president of the Unite States John Adams, and his wife Abigail Adams. It is even said that one time Georges Washington went to Abigail Adams to convey an important piece of advice to her husband.

When Roman Emperor Tiberias started commandeering the Senate, one senator protested and compared his governing body to an unheard and ignored wife. If a man, if a leader does not have a wife, he should at least be able to listen to the counsel of those wise people God put around him. It is a wise man who surrounds himself with people who are wiser than him. Paul was not married, but he worked within counsel. Though he took some liberties, he went to Jerusalem to make sure that his race was not in vain. He sought the approval of his own apostolic leaders..

Sad to say though, many leaders in their pride, fear, and insecurity surround themselves with passive people, or people who adulate them. There are also those who find an interest in the relationship. All those will not balance a leader or a teacher. Even if they try, they eventually will give in. The leader knows it and it will be his downfall in the sight of God if not in the sight of men.

May God give us leaders men who have a right spirit before Him; leaders whom the position of office does not corrupt with pride; true humble ministers of God’s flock who only wish to serve.

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TO THE BRIDE ...

11/16/2011

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Galatians 4:26
But the Jerusalem above is free, and she is our mother.

Then Isaac brought her (Rebecca) into the tent of Sarah his mother and took Rebekah, and she became his wife, and he loved her. (Genesis 24:67. It is said that in seeking a wife a man looks for another mother. Today, our stubborn demand for individuality makes potential wives want to distinguish and define themselves against their husband’s mothers. A man will often refer to his mother’s cooking as the best. New wives who haven’t sat learning at the feet of an older Mom feel they can’t compete and this often creates deep issues within families.

In the ancient world, a betrothed woman would spend her betrothal time until marriage learning about the things that please her husband. She would learn from his parents and others who knew him well. She would learn to prepare the food he likes, wear clothes and do her hair in the manner that he liked, as well as behave in the way that he liked. Today the mentality is more of, ‘if you love me, you take me as I am’. There is no respect for continuity, traditions, or culture and in the end, grand-children live in a different world than that of their grand-parents. This creates fragmented families. That’s why it is hard for old people; they feel everything they taught their children is gone and as a result they feel useless!

Sarah was the matriarch. Whole traditions of hospitality, care, wisdom and even of the prophetic gift have developed around her. She was a tough act to follow; that’s why Eliezer’s mission of finding Isaac a wife was so crucial. Though coming from the idolatrous culture of Babylon, she had to have the right spirit and endorse the traditions of Sarah, and she did. Isaac wanted, Isaac needed her to enter into his mother’s tent, continue in the godly traditions of his Mom. Things would have been different if she would have said, ‘Look, I am not living in your mother’s tent; can’t you give me my own tent; I am my own person after all, I left my parents house for you so you take me as I am …etc …etc…’.

Jewish prophetic eschatology compares Sarah to Jerusalem. After her second captivity, Sarah birthed Isaac. After the binding of Isaac, Sarah dies which the text narration follows with Isaac’s marriage to Rebecca, after a long time. This order of event is not coincidental. Classic Judaism always looked upon Isaac as foreshadow picture of the coming Messiah. Like Isaac, Yeshua had a miraculous birth and was sacrificed on the altar; the sacking and consequent dying of Jerusalem follows under the Roman Empire. A long time after, the text tells us, Yeshua will return to marry His bride.

Even now today, like Eliezer (meaning: my God is my help) of old did, the Holy Spirit, roams in the earth in search of the bride who will enter ‘Jerusalem/Sarah’s tent’ and continue in the Jewish traditions of His Mom; the bride where the Sabbath’ candle burns continually and where the ‘dough’ is blessed.

May we spend our time in preparation to please our Messiah, learning from the Torah all the things that please Him.

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THE TORAH RELEVANT FOR TODAY

THE IRREVOCABLE COVENANT!

THE BALANCE OF A MAN

THE SABBATH OF THE VIRTUOUS BRIDE

"SHE SHALL BE CALLED 'WOMAN'"

TO THE BRIDE ...

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